This post is gross. Of course not as gross as it was for those of us here, so enjoy the distance you have reading this.
Twas the night of Christmas and all through the house,
One parent bathed the kids -the female spouse.
She was hurried and busy, trying to pack
All the laundry and items in a giant stack.
It was past time for bed, and we would leave early in the morn.
We weren't all just tired, we were plain worn.
When it was Ellie's turn to bathe in her little seat,
I sat for a moment because I was so beat.
But the warm water relaxed more than just her skin
I knew what was about to happen due to her grin.
She proceeded to dump the hugest load of waste
So I snatched her up quickly without any haste.
It now took both parents and even an aunt
And a Grandma too to get the girl some new pants.
We cleaned and cleaned and embraced our cross
The timing of this event put us at a loss.
But it all got done and we had to laugh
At the turn of events that can happen starting with a bath.
Kids are work, ya'll!!! They ARE! Embrace it! Is that Murphy's Law or what that we would be at the finish line of Christmas day and have to go out in the freezing cold with gloves on and spray the plastic crevice-laden tub seat out on the driveway and then clean our stained bathtub with bleach. She's our first baby with poop that can stain ceramic. And what I've learned with Ellie is that when faced with this type of task, you just have to stay in the moment and get the job done. No time for "I can't believe this". I used to waste time on that thought. But what is there not to believe when your bathroom reeks of bleach and you throw two bath towels away instead of choosing to wash them? (her poop also stains cloth)
So while away from home we realized that when you hold her arm a little, she can sit up in the tub and you can get her clean! It was a gift to myself to come home and donate that little tub to the charity of my choice. Hopefully the baby that uses it next does not have a habbit of going in the bathtub like Ellie seems to. It happened away on our trip too by the way but was easy to just clean the bathtub afterwards.
We had that little tub for about 3 months and drove all around Atlanta finding the flea market that had it on craigslist. Another Murphy's Law. Parenting just makes no sense sometimes!
But it does make good poetry.
